Master storyteller, Bobby Hickey, recounts the events of his epic vacation. It’s almost as if you were right there with him as you listen to his beautifully crafted tale. Using his amazing ability with the English language, Bobby paints a mental image better than anyone in spoken word history. You’ve never heard a vacation adventure quite like this. You’re sure to be entertained by the clip above and someday, you might even pass this story down to your own children.

We cannot guarantee that you can listen to this story with a dry eye. You have been warned.

So you think YOU had it rough? If you want to feel a little better about your terrible date, check out these stories from Sara, Bobby, Eric, and Michael. You might have a little more pep in your step for that long Walk of Shame. When you finally get home, take a shower and a nap, then pick yourself back up and get back out there and try again (And by “get out there” we mean back on Tinder or Grinder, which ever you prefer).

Eric explains how he is more manlier than Michael since he can fix his own car.